Self Limiting Thought

“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bull@!#$ story you keep telling yourself as to why you can't achieve it.”    - Jordan Belfort

I have a young son that is learning about this self defeating thought process. As most children at some point must learn, my son has learned how to tie his shoes. The first few attempts were shaky at best, and the complaint was usually that the shoe did not tie tight enough. As time progresses, the mind changes from "I don't know how to tie my shoes," to "I can do it." There is actually a sense of pride in the fact that something new has been learned. Unfortunately, it has progressed beyond these words to, "Dad, will you tie my shoe for me." As a father, I have adopted the theory that if my son has been taught, and if he has exhibited the ability to do for himself, that which he is asking me to do, then I choose not to offer assistance. As you might imagine, this has not always been a popular decision with my son. I usually attempt to articulate to my son the reasoning behind my apparent madness. At some point in the exchange, I ask him why he doesn't want to tie his own shoes and his response is, "because I can't."

The really amazing point of this is that he can. I know he can, because I have seen him do it. He knows he can, because he has done it in the past. The issue is that once he utters those words, "I can't," then he is done. He is absolutely right. He has effectively limited his own potential and no amount of coaxing will bring him back to his senses, until he decides that once again... he can.

How often do we entertain this thought in ourselves. We might have heard this limiting phrasing before. "I am not a runner, I could never run a marathon." "I am not pretty enough, no one would date me." "I am not smart enough, school isn't my thing." We have all heard these statements swirling around us, and if we are really honest, we may have uttered these words ourselves.

The truth is we can do it, and it does not matter what it it is that we are thinking about doing.
So, here is the challenge. Remove these thoughts from our lives, work to remove the limits that we place on ourselves because we can achieve greatness. We can dream for something more than what or where we are right now. We may have to be patient with the circumstances that we find ourselves in currently, but by removing from our vocabulary the words "I can't," and replacing them with the words "I can," incredible things can, and will happen.

Looking for Improvement

"Never criticize improvement, no matter how small" anonymous

I have to start this blog off with this particular quote. I may say this, as it pertains to many quotes I reference, but this is truly one of my favorites. One of the reasons why I appreciate the sentiment that this quote communicates, is because day in, and day out, we have to make improvements in our lives. Much of the depression and heartache felt in this world is a direct result of not focusing in on this mantra. I think that if individuals would be more patient with each other, and themselves, not because they expect mediocrity out of humanity, but because in general, people are just doing the best that they can in their lives.

This example can be seen hundreds of thousands of times across many customer service exchanges that occur each day. A great example of this can be missed in the short term and never realized in the long term if we are not looking for and simply expecting improvement.

I am a manager at a credit union. Now this particular credit union got into trouble. You could say that the economy was bad, you could say that there were poor decisions made in management. You might even be able to narrow it down to the point that you can say, there is one person that made us fail, but the reality is, there were many reasons why we failed. I choose to believe that many variables created the environment that allowed us to fail, but even today, we have not closed our doors. The name has changed, your account number has changed, and you may even notice that you have a MasterCard debit card instead of a VISA debit card, but the improvement has happened. The universe has not conspired against you to make life more difficult and you can see the improvement if you are looking for it.

Where is this improvement to be found? You can find it in the lives of each employee that is stronger because they stuck it out through pay cuts, layoffs and budget slashing. You can find it in the merger of a small credit union that was years away from being able to afford the technology that would allow better access, products, and resources to its membership. You can now find it with the backing of a large institution that has been disciplined enough to put themselves into a position to even offer assistance to a small financial institution that WAS failing. You can find it in the membership who has been loyal to their credit union through the good and the bad. The credit union is not failing any more. It is thriving, and it will continue to do so. Why you might ask, because the individuals are trying today, to do a little better tomorrow.

This is not about business, this is about life. Each one of us has within us our own expectations of what we want out of life. Each day we are working towards that vision. Each day we either move closer to our goal, or farther from it, but if we stop and look around us for a brief moment, we might realize that we are not the same person that we were a month ago, a year ago, or a decade ago. Do we really want to be? No, we want to improve, we need to improve, it is what makes life worth living. Why are the ruts in life so hard to climb out of? Because we are not improving. Stop criticizing that the improvements that we are looking for are not coming fast enough, and just make sure that improvements are occurring and life will seem much more enjoyable.

Well, there you have it. My first quote, but now is the part where you come in. Do you agree, or disagree? Am I off my rocker, or not? Leave a comment, leave a story of why this might ring true for you, and maybe, just maybe, we can learn something from each other and make a small improvement in our own lives.

The First Official Post

Well, I guess today is the day. I have thought that I would one day be some sort of a writer. Today is officially that day in all its amateurish glory. I have a blog. And what could I possibly write about that would interest anyone to take notice, to listen, and or to interact with me.

If you know me at all, you will know that I love quotes. At work I consistently refer to "one of my favorite" quotes. For Christmas, people think to themselves, " what should we get Bill?" oh, I know, a quote book. I have to say, I do not mind in the least bit. So, that is what I going to write about, quotes. All kinds of quotes. My hope is that the quotes that I choose to write about will inspire, motivate, show perspective, but even more, I hope that it helps you to change. I hope that it helps me to change... Some days, the quotes may be funny, or serious, or sad, but what ever emotion that you feel, about whatever it is that you read, I hope that it makes you want to leave a comment. Share with me if you like my quotes as much as I do, or tell me how much you hate it. Maybe, I am the one that needs to change perspective.

The title of my blog is "Quotes in Action." The reason that I chose this title is because I want to hear about how these quotes ring true to you. Each day that I make a post, it will start with the quote, then I will illustrate the quote with a story, followed by my commentary. From there I hope to get your input. Share your stories, your commentary, and opinions. That is what is going to make this great or not.

Well... here it goes then. if you have any suggestions, just send them my way! Until then, tune in tomorrow for the first quote